My Thoughts, Sometimes
August 30, 2015
Sometimes, my thoughts are deer thoughts.
Soft, gentle, and kind.
Appearing, in calm dusks, bringing wonder and peace.
They tiptoe near my mind, without stirring things, too much.
Then gradually, like shadows, stealing a third dimension.
There is awareness, I am enveloped, in their loving midst.
It is quiet, in this soothing stealth, of meditation’s meadow.
And I can no longer find fear.
Sometimes, my thoughts are like elephants.
Crowding into spaces, already seeming full, and acting like they belong.
Their mass, squeezes reality estate, cornering me in my cortex.
Daring me, to poke back, as they become more pressing.
They can push me out, for a while, sometimes to breathe.
But between visits, I can change, the bars of my cell.
Building doors, of ample sizes, inviting larger guests outside.
When I decide, the primitive hazing, is over.
If I remain open, even elephants, will wander away.
I have mosquito memories, Kamikazes of cognition, appearing randomly, in expected places.
Their stinger’s search, for bloody vessels.
Finding spots to land, where I won’t look.
Once pierced, it matters not, what I do at that point.
Mosquito memories zip away, before I ever regain, my footing.
I can fog my brain; alcohol the trick, to numb fresh pricks.
But these Negative Types, of One Night Stands, always end horizontally.
In the morning, the bruises, are always waiting.
And Life’s threads, seem even harder, to weave.
Reality can be a scary place, full of insects and beasts.
To be alive, one must bear the weights, of silence and thunder.
The deer are harmless, and remind you, calm places have kind faces.
They are also the most timid, requiring space, without predatory judgment.
The elephants pack your trunk, with the things you can’t forget, in the jungle.
They will smother, and trample you, at times.
But you are the Master, of your Domain, and can always survive.
If you only remember to.
Once elephants and deer are tamed, all that’s left, are the mosquitoes.
I’m still don’t know, how to beat, those sneaky vampires.
They remain, the worst buggers, of them all.
For now, I just tell them to F-
Simon Trepel, MD
Simon Trepel, MD FRCPC, is a practicing Child and Adolescent Psychiatrist, in Winnipeg, Canada. He is an Assistant Professor, at the University Of Manitoba, in the Faculty of Medicine, and the Co-founder of the GDAAY Clinic. He is, more importantly, the proud Father of 2 beautiful Daughters. He writes in his spare time about things he knows something about, and occasionally about things he doesn’t; like Yoga, and Italian flavored coffees. He prefers elephants to mosquitoes.
Check out his Blog, called Simon Says Psych Stuff, at